49 last post

Strange feeling, it's really just a number, but in a little while, if nothing happens to me, I will have clocked up 50 years, as my birth date was 12th December 1954. I did major research on hiring, buying, reselling bikes and as I got closer to purchasing one, Angela & Dad offered to buy one for me for my birthday and Christmas present. Today I finally picked up a 26 speed Avanti ATB and it's riding well. Although there's a slight problem with the gears, I'll take it back in on Monday for Natural High to adjust.
Been doing a few rides on a borrowed bike and apart from a stiff head wind occassionally, it's a great place for a bike. Main roads are a nightmare, car drivers have little awareness of cyclists here, as in the UK.
Dad continues to show signs of improvement to his health, with Angela's invaluable and constant support. This evening Helen and I prepared the evening meal, full roast lamb followed by gin and tonic jelly, summer fruit and custard for pudding.
It's great being here with family and a lovely environment, however, I cannot shake off the 'blue' feeling I've had for the last 5 years. If it wasn't for my work, my heart would feel quite dark. It mainly stems from not being able to be fully at ease and understood. I've been on my own for so long now, I doubt whether things will change. We'll see, 50 years down! Can't believe it.